What causes wrinkles?

By Jack Elliott
Contributor

With another curling season drawing to a close, what are your memories of bonspiels past? An eight ender? A party you can’t remember? How about strangers in the night?
The whole gang had travelled out of town for the big weekend. It would be a great winter break. Sure the men could curl, but the women could shop and the kids could frolic in that big pool. The hotel was laid out in a big square with the pool in the centre with rooms on both floors facing the water. It was downright tropical. Lots of greenery and humidity to rehydrate that dried out winter skin.
By the time everyone had settled in for the night Sweetie found the air in her room absolutely oppressive so she slid open the patio door onto the courtyard for a bit of relief.
“That’s better,” she sighed as the air movement wafted her off to dreamland with a just a bit of worry about the open door. Hubby snored quietly beside her.
Sometime later she awoke with a start! In the dim light the figure of a naked man stood at the foot of the bed. What was Hubby doing up? But no as she groped to her right he was still in bed and still snoring!
“Wake up! Wake up!” Sweetie hissed shaking Hubby vigorously.
“Huh! Huh? What’s the matter?” snorted Hubby coming alive.
“There’s a naked man in our room!” Sweetie hissed.
“Of course there is. I always sleep in the raw,” answered a confused Hubby. The naked figure at the foot of the bed never moved.
“No, no! There!” replied Sweetie pointing vigorously at the intruder.
Hubby exploded out of bed demanding what the intruder was doing in their room and to get the @#$% out. The two faced each other for a moment and the intruder stammered something and exited the room back onto the balcony and wandered away either in a sleep or alcohol induced stupor.
By now the commotion had most of the curling crew women peering out of the curtains. The intruder continued around the balcony until passing a door on the far side, it suddenly opened; an arm shot out, grabbed him, and dragged him inside.
Quiet returned. Sweetie bolted her door and settled into a troubled sleep. Hubby was snoring in five minutes.
In the morning with the men off to an early match, the ladies were settled into a leisurely brunch in the courtyard. A man approached stammering his apologies.
“I must have been sleep walking last night and I think I wandered into someone’s room,” he explained, claiming his memory of the incident was unclear and he wasn’t sure which room he had entered.
“I wanted to apologize if you could tell me which person’s room I entered. I can’t even remember what he looked like. Kinda short and really wrinkled,” he concluded.
No one helped him out claiming ignorance of the whole episode.
No harm done. In fact with his new nickname, Wrinkles skipped a winning team that weekend, a legend in his own time.