Reunited: Gill Stamler remeets her son after 33 years

By Ken Johnston
Editor

After 33 years Gillian Stamler of Rainy River was reunited with a son who has been virtually half a world away.
Gareth Sage, who will be 41 next month, visited Rainy River to get to know his mom, Gill, who saw him for the last time when he was eight years old.
Stamler had been married to Gareth’s father while living in England. When the marriage did not work out the couple went their separate ways in a big way. Gill came to Canada and Gareth moved to Australia with his dad.
“We basically lost contact for 33 years. It was awfully hard,” said Gill last week. Then, last March, out of the blue, she received a handwritten letter from Australia.
“At first I thought it was some kind of scam. I turned it over and saw his (Gareth’s) name,” said Gill. She said she read it and walked across the street from the post office to long time friend’s office Maureen Downs at Gillons Insurance. “She said I was as white as a sheet and shaking.”
Gareth has almost given up hope that she was going to want to communicate with him as he asked that she send him an email to confirm receipt of the letter. But it took a month for it to get here. Gill sent him an email and then proceeded to handwrite him a letter back. Both detailed their lives since their last contact.
Gill said that she had maintained contact with her ex-sister-in-law over the years so she knew where Gill was. Gareth had read some things about his mom on www.RainyRiverRecord.com. “He knew Robert (her late husband) had passed away from the obit on line. It was one of the things that triggered him reaching out to me.”
After some mutual exchanges of handwritten letters they began using the internet to communicate and soon pictures of each other and each other’s family members were in each other’s homes. Gareth has a wife, Rebecca, and two daughters Ellie, 5, and Abby, 3. Gareth is a corporate lawyer in Sydney, Australia and his wife is a school teacher.
When he pulled up on Sept. 28th, Gill’s heart raced. I opened the door and her dog Prince ran out and greeted him like he knew him. She admitted she was very nervous for the first while but after about 30 minutes it was like they had never been apart. “We found it very easy to talk to each other.”
Gareth came alone this time, flying over to Canada after a family wedding in England. “He thought it would be better to have some one on one time,” said Gill. But that one on one time quickly evaporated as Gill had all of her sons and their families over on Saturday. Gareth met brothers he had never known, Serge, Richard and Daniel. Then on Sunday Gill invited neighbours and friends to meet him.
Gill said many people came and all were interested in him and his life in Australia.
On Monday it was more one on one time as they travelled by car to Morson where she showed him the family cottage. He was very interested in the First Nations communities and the pow wow grounds.
That evening Serge treated Gareth to a fresh cooked walleye dinner which Gareth had never tasted before. She said he loved it and there was talk of Gareth going fishing on the next visit. As Serge is a taxidermist, his collection of mounted deer heads, fish and a bear cub totally enthralled Gareth.
While he left on Tuesday, Gill made sure to show him as much of her life as she could. “Many people said he has so many of my mannerisms. There were also several comments about how he looks like her and so does her new granddaughters.
Gill said she and Robert talked about reuniting with Gareth over the years and she regrets that Robert is not here now to be a part of it, but she said he would be very happy it happened.
The pair have already emailed back and forth several times since he left last Tuesday. Gill is now planning to take Gareth up on an invitation to visit Australia Christmas of 2008.
Gill said his leaving was tough. But optimistically said, “It was not so much about saying good bye as it was about saying hello!”
She said she feels like a huge void has been filled in her life and that all of her family and friends were so supportive. “It is like a whole new chapter in my life.”